Sick of loneliness
by samanddiane4ever
Summary: This new fic takes a character appeared in the first season in the episode "The guys at the bar": Tom Kenderson was a baseball teammate of Sam and forays in his youth. I thought it was interesting the subject of this story. I hope you enjoy it and tell me your opinions.
1. Chapter 1

Tom Kenderson was walking for a neighborhood far away from the city center on the way to his home. There was no money for living in other way. All the luxuries and life savings as Red Sox player and writer, had been slowly disappearing like sugar in a cup of coffee. Writer...What an irony! Had long without writing really. Lately he just wrote on Facebook. His last work was in a drawer in his house prisoner of the dark, dusty and forgotten. To date, no one wanted to publish it for being too realistic and gritty. But from his point of view, that's life…!

Now Tom was in front of his laptop. Sipping a beer as his own life. First, a large sips to quench their thirst, and then slowly for fear finish. He had a lot of friends in his Facebook account. Some people he had not seen in his life and others that lived thousands of miles away in another state, in another country, on another continent…

—-

Diane had not yet arrived. Today Sam had come before her home. He did not want to spend more time at the bar. Had wanted to be alone with his wife, get some dinner anywhere, chat with her, to laugh, kiss her, perhaps making love. During the day he had tried to contact Diane, but he could not; so he decided to wait at home.

When Sam arrived , took a shower and changed his clothes. He was served a glass of cold lemonade and then sat in the lounge with his laptop on your knees. He was watching his Facebook profile, when suddenly it happened: a friend request. When reading that name, Sam paled :Tom Kenderson. Of course he accepted. In a private chat, he asked for his phone number and meet him somewhere.

Since January 83, he didn´t know nothing about him. In the past, they were always very close. From the time they played together on the Red Sox, until the last occasion, when Tom presented his book at 'Cheers' and he decided to go public his homosexuality, Sam always supported Tom and he thanked him. After then, their lives had discoursed separate. Upon learning that Tom also lived in LA, Sam invited him to stop by 'Home Run'. Sam was happy. Something that he was lost, it was going to recover the next day.

When Diane came home, he told her what happened. She was surprised at first as much as Sam. Diane was happy for him. She knew how much he appreciated to his friend Tom.

Next day Sam was behind the bar when suddenly he saw come on a tall man, broad-shouldered but with ramshackle and skinny body, with straight hair and gray and face furrowed by a thousand wrinkles.

The guy looked in all directions looking for someone. Suddenly he stared at Sam and smiled resolutely as he led his steps directly toward him. In a few seconds, the confusion of Sam turned into surprise and amazement, recognizing his old friend Tom by the brightness of his eyes, the rest could be anyone. Sam had to swallow hard to hide the negative impression that gave him the appearance of Tom after so long.

-My God, Tom! Is it really you? Good to see you !.

-Hi Sam! … It's good.

After shaking hands and give him a big hug, Sam invited Tom to his office to talk quietly and asked for Julia to carry something to drink. After settling in the comfortable chairs in the office, Sam started talking.

-It has been a long time since the last time we saw -Sam said.-

-Yes it's true, -Tom said-Thirty-one years, to be exact. How has been your life ?.

Sam told him briefly all the key events of his life in thirty-one years: his relationship with Diane, his return to drinking and subsequent rehabilitation, the death of Coach, his wedding, his move to LA, Samuel and his university career, his reconciliation with his father and Derek ...

-Well -said Sam- and you?, how have you been?.

Tom looked down with sad and serious countenance. Too many ghosts wanted to leave at once to the surface, leaving the bitter taste in his mouth when memories being evoked again.

-After the presentation of my book at Cheers I realized that was just beginning. At that time, homosexuality was still frowned upon. It was a long and difficult road that is not yet complete. For one, I lost lifelong friends as Dave Richards, who threw me out of his house almost kicked while, on the other hand, emerged new friends. My first book led to another, and another, and another …,

book I wrote was published, I was successful. The publishers were fighting over them. I won a lot of money.

-That's great,Tom -said Sam-.

-Yes, it was! -Tom said wistfully- But that all changed ten years later.

-Why? Sam asked.

-I went on a Caribbean cruise. In one of the ports where we stopped, I met a very handsome guy and tan ... What I will tell you?!

Tom had to stifle his laughter to see how Sam was squirming in his seat secretly -I think you get the picture!.

-Well, yes, -said Sam - What happened after?.

-A few weeks after that torrid night of passion, I discovered that the fruit of that had crystallized in AIDS.

-Do you have AIDS? ! Sam almost stands, with eyes wide, at the news.

-Yes and no -Tom said with quiet pause.-

-What do you mean? -Sam said nervously- AIDS has or does not have.!…

Tom looked with condescension and gratitude to Sam. He could see his old friend looked at him with eager real concern. For some time something like that didn´t happen in his life.

- I'm HIV positive- Tom said in grave and solemn tone-.

-What the hell does that mean? -Sam asked.

I have antibodies to the virus in the early phase within me, but lethargic, immersed in a deadly sleep. The day the virus becomes active in my body, my days are numbered.

Sam didn´t know what to say. Tom meant a lot to him. It was not only his friend and partner of baseball. When he was confronted with his father and brother, Tom was like a brother to him. Now Tom was facing him, scrawny, with tattered clothes and fingernails blackened with grime around the edges, saying he has AIDS…

-When people learned that he had AIDS, they began to move away from me. First occurred in the environment of my friends. All were excuses not to come home, go out for a drink or go to the movies. Then were the publishers. They didn´t want publish any of my works. In fact I have at home a book that I wrote at the time, and they all refused to publish. Finally, the family. My parents rejected me. They was told that had embarrassed them twice: when I announced that I was a dirty gay and with my disease of perverted fagot. Then my sister told me that she felt unable to stay with me, because, with my illness, feared her son would became ill.

-Susan? ! -Sam said surprised. Tom and Susan always had been united.

-Yes, Susan- corroborated Tom- . I got a couple of nephews unknown for me ... and I for them ... because I don´t exist …

At this point Tom's voice broke, but before Sam could say anything, he took heart of grace and continued with firm tone:

-When I realized I was alone, I decided to look for work. It was useless, when they learned that he had AIDS, I lost my job. That was when I moved here, at LA. I rented a small apartment in the suburbs, very cheap, and, since then, I live with my savings, the money I made in my heyday. End of story. -Tom initialed all with a forced smile, tinged with loneliness and despair.- Sam was speechless. He was slowly assimilating the story of his friend, his comrade. It was too bitter, rough and tough to swallow in a single bite.

-…So that thing is sleeping inside you ... -said Sam breaking an uncomfortable silence- Well... do not put the loud radio, lest it wakes up.

Tom laughed at the joke Sam. Then, Sam said:

-Seriously, Tom. you can not go on like. I'll try to help you. First of all, I will not forgive you left without saying anything. Second, if you try to escape again I will find you and kill you . Sam gave him a visiting card.

If you need anything, call me. Regarding your book, my wife is a writer and works in a publishing house, which is owned by my brother. Let me talk to them and see what I can do. For starters, come home for dinner tomorrow and we talk with Diane. And I warn you: I do not accept no for an answer.

Tom was puzzled. Was the first time in a long time that someone treated him as a person. He could not help and, standing up, hugged Sam. Sam returned his hug. At this moment, Julia came into the office with drinks. Seeing his boss hugged this guy, she dropped the tray with drinks, scaring the two friends.

But ...what do you do?! -Sam said startled- look what you've done!. You've left everything a mess.!

Sorry Sam. Now I clean and bring other drinks …

- Don´t worry Sam. I have to go now. Thanks. See you…

When Tom left, Sam turned to Julia.

What happened to you ?.

Nothing ... I ... -Julia said shyly- I see you hugging a man ...

Just a moment! -Sam said angrily- What are you thinking? Tom is just a friend, a good friend. Don´t think strange things. Understood ?.

- Yes Sam - Julia said again before leaving.

Will continue…


	2. Chapter 2

**After days without my PC, I'm back to writing. I'm also preparing my upcoming trip to Boston from Madrid. I never thought when I started watching the show " Cheers " in 1989, that my passion for the show would lead me to make a long journey to see first hand the places where Sam and Diane lived their love story. I hope to see many things and this visit might enrich my stories from now. I find fascinating learning a bit the USA culture. I'll tell you. Meantime, I hope you enjoy this new chapter.**

Chapter 2

Sam grabbed his jacket, felt his pockets to find his smartphone. Then he called Diane.

-Where are you ?.

-In the editorial -Diane said almost in a whisper- I'm in a meeting with my publisher .

-Are you with Ryan McLaren ?.

-Yes, Why? -Diane asked.

-Please, wait for me. I'm coming to editorial. I have to talk to you and Ryan.

Sam grabbed the car keys and his jacket, and went to meet his wife as they had agreed.

When he got to the publisher, they were waiting in the office of Ryan McLaren. After the mandatory greetings, Sam was straight to the point and told them with great detail his encounter with Tom Kenderson. Meanwhile, Diane looked her husband swollen with pride and satisfaction.

-And ... that was it ... By the way, Diane. You're going to have to forgive me. I invited Tom to dinner after tomorrow, without having spoken to you…

Sam was still talking when he realized that Ryan looked at him smiling. He was angry because Sam still remembered the episode when he went with Diane, Ryan and his family to the opera, and Ryan, before Sam's sensibility in a certain moment of the representation, thought that Sam possibly was gay, like he...

-Ryan, stop looking at me like that! -said Sam- It is true, I have come to ask for help for a friend, but if you keep looking at me that way, I'll ...

Come on Sam, don´t go with those pieces of macho bravado, -Ryan said as he continued smiling-. Save your energy and your adrenaline for best things. I'm laughing because your little woman told me you were a excellent person. She´s very in love with you, and it´s wonderful... You have a heart of gold. Diane has been very lucky with you… You can count on me, I will help with that friend of yours, Tom.

Sam remained surprised before his declaration.

-This is fantastic! -Diane said- you too should come to dinner with us home, -said Diane referring to Ryan.-

-I'll gladly -politely said- I'm very intrigued to know Sam's friend. His story is fascinating ... sad ... but exciting.

When they returned home, Sam called immediately Tom and told him his conversation with the editor.

-So ... When you avenge to dinner, brings your book in order that Diane and Ryan see it.

-Thank you Sam! . It is more than I could imagine. I have no words to express my gratitude...

-Tiny writer!, that you do not know what to say...

After a guffaw, they said goodbye till next night.

That night, Tom got well dressed, with cut hair and clean shaven. Nobody would think that he lived on the edge of destitution. Dinner was a success: food, wine and spirits, desserts ... everything. Then they went to the comfortable and cozy lounge to take coffee where Diane and Ryan saw Tom's book.

After a shallow review and conversation about the book, Ryan reached his judgement:

-It is an intense and moving story ... I like it - Ryan said-.

-True -added Diane- also has a flexible and educated style, which makes reading enjoyable.

Tom and Sam looked happy and smiling. While Ryan went on, and it was like a bucket of cold water:

-I would publish it, I honestly like it, but I have my doubts whether the Board would agree with that.

-What do you mean? -Tom inquired pale and serious-.

-If after a dinner you see one of the guest with the tie splashed with fat of the meat, and tell him with accusing finger: "Are you a piggy. You have a spot of just sauce here", what you say is true, but the guest will look at you badly. The reason is very simple: You've put him in evidence before them all.

-What Ryan meant to say -explained Diane- is that book has an extraordinary emotional load, channeled by way of social criticism, and managers are not going to like anything, and that would jeopardize the project.

-Yes Sam, I called them hypocrites and left them with her ass in the air .

- I think we should think of something.-said Ryan- I'd really like to publish this book. Ryan looked Tom. I think that you Diane and your husband might speak with his brother Derek about it.

Everyone thought possible solutions to convince the owners of the publishing Tom´s book. But nobody came up with anything definitive, probably to speak with Derek was the best idea. Speaking it was done late. It would be best to sleep on. Tom was the first to leave, Ryan seconds later. In addition, Ryan offered Tom to accompany him to his home in his car.

**It will continue…**


	3. Chapter 3

At last, Sam and Diane were alone, in the privacy of their home and Sam opened his heart to Diane.

-I think that, in the end, have you not been very considerate with Tom -said Sam upset- you give first hopes and then you toss the rug from under his feet. I hate those things !.

-What you´re saying it´s false.-said Diane- what happens is that there are many ways of saying things without hurting the feelings of the people. It must be careful with the way in which the truths are told. Our publisher does not publish sensationalist literature, it is not our style. I think that Tom should tone down. Ryan and I can help him. I mean I'm on your side.-Diane said stroked Sam's cheek - ... I try to help.

-You may be right, -said Sam with the spirits appeased - Tomorrow we'll talk with Tom.

-Shall we talk? -Diane repeated.

-Yes, you heard right - As always, I need you, you express things better …

—-

The next day Sam and Diane met with Tom again. They told their impressions of the book and that he should change some nuances. Sam gave him the feeling that he accepted his advice too quickly. Sam knew Tom very well, and he knew that his friend was a bit stubborn.

-What's up, Tom? You do not give your budge so easily.

-I do not know what you mean… -said Tom trying to hide-

-Are you sure?

Tom he was caught by his friend and had no choice but to confess.

-Last night, after dinner at your house, Ryan brought me home in his car. Along the way we were talking about my book. The truth is that we talked at length, and finally left me pretty convinced to make several changes to my manuscript.

-And from what I see, Ryan was very persuasive …-Diane said Tom with a smile.-

Tom, startled, looked back to Diane. After a mischievous look of Diane, Tom admitted the evidence.

-Yes, Diane. Ryan is very persuasive when he tries.

-Go Tom! … Please, start writing...-Sam said while patted the back to Tom.-

—

Next weeks, the work done to move forward and to be published book, was titanic. All helped Tom: Sam, Diane and Ryan. Finally was the last hurdle: the Board of Directors chaired by Derek.

Then, came the day of the board meeting. Ryan heatedly defended Tom's book. Sam and Diane waited outside the meeting room. From there you could hear voices and screams. Sam was getting nervous.

-They will not post, they will not post!- Sam murmured between his teeth

-Calm down! - said Diane.

-This will not end like that… -Sam said without hearing what Diane said, and without another word walked to the meeting room.

-Sam! What the ...!Sam wait! - said Diane.

Sam burst into the room with the force of a thousand hurricanes to the amazement and perplexity all, especially Ryan and Derek.

-Hi, Derek! Sam was greeted coldly followed by a silent Diane. Can we talk privately for a moment ?.

-Sam! Are you crazy? Derek said very upset- we´re in a meeting ...

-I know you're in a meeting and I know that treats this meeting. That's precisely what I want to talk -Sam replied boldly and firmly.-

-Okay Sam, you win -and he continued : 'Five minutes of rest, gentlemen!, please leave us alone ... Diane, you stay…

**Will continue…**


	4. Chapter 4

When everyone left, Derek mustered patience and self-control to listen to his brother. He was visibly angry. He did not like being interrupted during meetings.

- Tell me, Sam. You say…

-Well ... you see ... -Sam said a bit hesitantly - I know you are discussing about the book of

Tom Kenderson. He is a friend and colleague who played with me on the Red Sox. I would like to ask you, as a favor, its publication.

-Oh, wow! -Derek said sarcastically- . Why did not you tell me before?… No problem!, Now I will enter the board of directors and tell them that the book will be published because the author is a friend of my little brother. Are you happy?

-For my not it funny -Sam said angrily-.

-And what do you want I do?! What I have to take seriously? -Derek also said angrily.-

-Tom was like a brother to me at the time. Kenderson and Coach were my only family when my own family ignored me.-said Sam-.

Derek paused, eaten by guilt and regret. Sam also fell silent by the same feelings as he said those words. Hadn´t been his intention, but sounded reproach. At that time, Diane intervened:

-You are fools. The two. In your chess game of stupidity, you have finished in a draw. When are you going to overcome your differences in the past? When you can talk about it without feel guilty? . I know Sam better than anyone. I know he didn´t want to blame you, Derek. What Sam wanted, is to highlight the importance of friendship to Tom in a moment of his life, so that you understand. Although by the difficult and thorny moment in time for you two, it sounded to reproach. Must we heard from outside, and it's a bit unfair what you are asking: changes, suppression of episodes or whole chapters ... We read it before submit it to the publisher. I assure you it has softened more than you can imagine. Asking more, would be killing the soul of the author and castrate him intellectually. You have the vision of economic profit, but we defend intellectual integrity, the message, denouncing injustice which unfortunately is repeated too many times in too many lives of people around the world ...

-What do you propose, Diane? Derek asked-

-A small number of copies… -said Diane-

-That does not give money, and you know it Diane

-Always the fucking money! ... not very large losses would be, and who knows if it is a success! then, and have good benefits…

-Because he´s your friend, I can try. Right. I will try to convince the council, although I do not promise anything…

After so many years, Sam still was surprised with the power of conviction of Diane. Sam and Diane thanked the help of Derek, and left the room as they entered the council members. Once outside, Sam hugged Diane.

-Thank you, Diane. You are incredible …I love you so much !

-There is nothing to thank. What is important for my man, is important to me. Besides, Tom is also a colleague, and mates must help between them -Diane said with a wide smile on her sweet face.-

Neither could nor wanted to avoid it, and Sam and Diane was melted into a kiss in the middle of the waiting room, in front of a smiling and pleased Ryan as witness.

**Soon the outcome**


	5. Chapter 5

**After my return from Boston and meet some senior obligations, I write again. I mean it's been a fantastic journey . I met Cheers excited. I would return soon. I hope you enjoy this last episode of "Sick of loneliness."**

The day of the presentation of the book arrived. Ryan moved all threads to attract the largest possible number of the reporters before press conference.

Since Sam and Tom were reunited, Tom's life had improved substantially. Even his appearance. No longer he was dirty and ragged. On the contrary, he was well groomed. For that occasion he was well dressed, like Sam and Ryan. Diane was also gorgeous, more than one man at the meeting looked twice when passing in front of her. She was really pretty and sexy.

When Tom went out to start the press conference, nerves betrayed him. Collapsed.

-Sam I cannot!. I'm afraid to go out alone with these people.

-Come on! don't say this! -protested Sam- you can not do this ... We have all worked hard to make this a reality today.

-You mean that a stadium full to overflowing roaring in the stands you aren´t afraid , and journalists frighten you? -Ryan said in desperate tone- This is amazing !.

-Let him, Ryan! -protested Diane- Do not you realize he´s nervous and he has an anxiety attack ?.

Tom look at her.

-All right. Now listen. -said Diane- Forget everything and breathe deeply ... slowly. Now curb the air a few seconds and exhale gently through the mouth ...

Tom obediently did the exercise several times. He drank some water. He relaxed.

- Sam you remember that when you get drunk before a game, ask me accompany you to the base to hit?- said Tom-

-Yeah, sure, -said Sam.- He knew where Tom would want to go with this. Do you want that I come out with you, isn´t it?.

-Yes -Tom said smiling at being discovered in his intentions- it would be a last favor.

-Last favor? Do not make me laugh. Between friends there is no last favors, and less between you and me. Is it clear ?.

Sam and Tom embraced. But Diane urged them to leave at once. Thus began the press conference.

-My question is for you both -said a reporter-, a young boy, perhaps a pretentious scholarship holder, wanting to draw attention:

-During the presentation of his first book in 1983, when you did publishes your homosexuality, he did so with the support of his fellow in Red Sox, Sam Malone. Now the same thing happens again. What does this mean? …you cannot present a book without the company of your friend, Malone?

-It simply means that we are friends, like brothers. We have spent much together. Of the two, I'm gay. He´s heterosexual, married with a wonderful woman, that I´m proud to say that also is my friend, and they both have a fantastic son.- said Tom very calm.-

-When you were going to play games out of your city, did you sleep together?- asked the impertinent scholar-

-We slept in the same room -Tom said with infinite patience-. Each one in his bed.

-Pardon my intrusion -Sam said- that's not true, Tommy. You know it.

-What do you mean? -Tom said.-

-Do you remember Chicago? -Sam was aware that the whole audience was tense awaiting his confession- we slept in separate beds but alone ...

-Well, yes -Tom admitted- I "slept" with that stewardess of the TWA…

-Yes, meanwhile I was with two girlfriends…

The audience began to laugh. Tom began to relax. It was that Sam pretended with his joke. Who was not relaxed was the impertinent scholar…

-Your book is called "Sick of loneliness" what do you want reflect with that title? -said a young and pretty journalist-

-The disease that homosexuals are doomed ... people who are different in general. We live in a hypocritical society. On the one hand offers support, but then when you turn your back, betray you, 'said Tom.

-Do you really believe that, in our days…?- insisted the journalist.

-Yes -Tom said convinced- the world want equality for all people, regardless of their sexual orientation, among other things. But that's not true. if in the middle of an election campaign, for example, if it´s discovered that a candidate is gay , his political career, and perhaps professional time, is over. I think that homosexuality, in a certain way and in the eyes of certain people, is still an handicap.

An uncomfortable silence interrupted by small whispers of the crowd was made. Finally broke the silence another reporter's question:

-Mr. Kenderson, you say being HIV positive. In the 80s, when you publicly accepted the fact of your homosexuality, there were several clergymen, and many people in society, who thought AIDS was a divine punishment. What do you think about that statement ?.

-Well -said Tom-, I'm not Catholic, in that sense I prefer not to pass judgment about this view of the Church and certain conservative sectors of society.

Then Sam tried to intervene:

-Leave you to me, I will answer, -said Sam-. As you all know, I'm from Boston, a descendant of Irish emigrants. In my family we are all Catholics. My parents, my brother, my wife and son. My mother taught me that God is love. We are his sons. For that, the words to which you allude seem an aberration. They have no sense. Which father punish with sickness and death to his sons? . Those words were spoken by crazy hotheads who wanted to justify his abomination towards homosexuals. I read this book, and Tom is right. We live in a hypocritical society. His book is an indictment of that society. It is in our power to change these injustices. The world is very big and there are place for all of us. ... do not you think? .Sam was silent.

The whole audience cheered. Tom and Sam shook hands and they said goodbye to reporters. The press conference was a success. Diane, from offstage, looked proud and with tears in her eyes to Sam, her beloved husband. Her intuition told her that this book was going to succeed and be a positive turning point in the life of Tom Kenderson.

The end.


End file.
